ESPN: Hello?

ESPN: Yes, this is the publishing department.

ESPN: This is who?

ESPN: I see, what kind of story do you have?

ESPN: Who is this again?

ESPN: Did you take steroids?

ESPN: Drugs?

ESPN: How many rings did you get?… Oh, never out of the first round… Where exactly is the story?

ESPN: I see, you were hoping for numbers similar to the LA contract you missed out on, but you got waived.

ESPN: I’m sorry, you weren’t that good, honestly I don’t even remember you. I don’t think we could find enought people who remember you to sell enough books to go to press with, unless you can come up with something better than that..

ESPN: Gay?

ESPN: New York Times list here we come…………………